Scattered Life (Bikhari Zindagi) is a poem I had written a couple of years ago when life just seemed hard and it felt like I could not catch a break. Today is no different though. With the pandemic, I am sure most of us (if not all) have felt like this one time or another. The poem is in Hindi and I have tried to loosely translate it to English. I hope you like it.
ज़िंदगी बिखरी पड़ी है फ़र्श पे, कुछ टुकड़े इतने छोटे है, डर लगता है की मैं अगर पैर रखू, तो शायद चूर चूर ना हो जाये। कभी कभी ऐसे लगता है, अभी तो थामा था ज़िंदगी को, हलके हाथों से पकड, दबे पैर, अभी तो आगे बढ़ने लगा था। पर कभी कभी ऐसे लगता है, एक अरसा बीत गया ज़िंदगी बिखरे हुए, सालो से इन गिरे हुए टुकड़ों को निहार रहा हु, आँखो के नीचे झुर्रिया आ गयी है अब तो। समेटना चाहता हु अब ज़िंदगी को, ध्यान से टुकड़े पर टुकड़ा रख, गोंद से लकीरों को जोड़ के, धूप में सुखाना चाहता हु। पर डर लगता है, की कही समेटते हुए, ज़िंदगी कही और ना बिखर जाये, टुकड़े इतने ना हो जाये की गिन भी ना पाऊ।
Life is scattered over the floor, Some pieces are so small, I fear if I step on them, I will break them further. Sometimes, it feels like, I had just held life, With soft hands and light-foot, I had just started to move ahead. But, then, sometimes, it feels like, It has been a long time since life scattered, And I have been staring at it for years, Wrinkles have formed under my eyes now. I want to assemble my life together, Carefully, piece by piece, Applying gum over the edges, I want to dry it under the sun. But I fear, While I try to assemble, I don't end up scattering life further, So the pieces are not even be countable.
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